January 30th, 2016 - (Braden's Choice)
Rarely do I ever drink these days. It was never quite my vice, to be honest. But when I do drink, I drink. And when I day drink, I DRINK.
Barbrix - A wine bar and sometime brunch location. Inside/Outside seating, and reservations are almost certainly required if you would like a table. If you do not have a reservation, you may sit at the bar and spend two hours staring at all the empty tables that have been reserved that morning.
Bottomless mimosas for $8.00
I am going to repeat that, because that bears repeating: They serve bottomless mimosas for $8.00/person here. Do they make money off that? No. But after you get the munchies, they do.
Mimosa #1: Braden and I sat at the corner of the square bar and started off right away. After a toast to raises and feeling good about life, we downed our first one. I had been sipping on coffee for a few minutes prior, so as to prepare myself for the eventual entrance of alcohol into my system. These mimosas, by the by, were very well balanced, and delicious.
Mimosa #2: The bartender came by with refills and took our orders. I downed about half of my flute right there, determined to get my money's worth. In my head, I needed to drink about four of them to truly get value for my purchase. Two dollars a pop seemed reasonable enough.
Mimosa #3: The food came out quickly - and none too soon, as I began to feel a bit anxious and hangry. I ordered the Smoked Salmon Benedict with a side of fresh fruit. I had, at this point, been one-for-one with my coffee/mimosa intake, so I didn't feel like I was slowing down at all. I could still feel my teeth, and I wasn't slurring. Still golden. Downed most of that sucker before I dove in to my breakfast.
Braden went after the Breakfast Poutine with a side of bacon - and was also toe-to-toe with me on mimosas. The eggs are perfect at this place. Never underestimate the power of a well-prepared egg.
Mimosa #4: True to form, I inhaled my food. The bartender kept up with us quite nicely, though, which caused me to slow down and split my attention equally between bites of delectable Smoked Salmon Benedict, and mouthfuls of refreshing, inebriating mimosa.
Mimosa #5: This is where things started to get a little wonky. Braden and I were discussing concrete things, like work, and studio apartments. Now we were talking about humanism and "getting out of your comfort zone". I could feel my blood turning a light orange, and little champagne bubbles forming on my soft palate. I also think I had begun leaning forward a little. Braden went out to refill his parking meter.
Mimosa #6: I didn't even see this one happen. I drained number 5, looked away while my hand was still on the glass, and when I looked back, the glass was full. And HERE'S where they get you. To make up for the loss that they incur from making the mimosas bottomless, they tempt you with deserts. So I got the Honey Lavender Panna Cotta.
I'm going to be honest. That's not my picture. I found that on Yelp, or something. Mine was actually bigger than that. But I was so focused on eating it, that I forgot to take a picture.
Mimosa #7: I also forgot about the bartender filling up our glasses every chance he could. As I drowned in blissfully light panna cotta, round seven was right there waiting for me when I came up for air. Braden, at this point, asked for the check. Which was a good idea, as I was about half an hour from needing to refill my parking meter. Lord knows I wasn't going anywhere for a while.
Mimosa #8: This was "one for the road", I think. We paid, and finished our flutes. As I stood up, two things happened. First, I felt the world shift really sharply to the left. Second, I felt my bladder almost explode. I didn't realize just how drunk I was. And as I unceremoniously excused myself to go to the restroom, with each step I grew increasingly drunker and drunker. I suppose most of a bottle of champagne in an hour will do that to you.
Braden and I said goodbye outside the restaurant, and nodded in approval of it. Barbrix was an absolute success. As I walked across the street to my car, I knew I was in no condition to drive. Not the first time I've slept in my car, and I'm sure it will not be the last. It certainly was the first time that I slept off being drunk in a parking spot on the side of the road.
The truly strange part was having to wake up every hour to feed the meter, and being judged by the 10 year old kids on their skateboards trying to play out on the sidewalks. I wanted to look at them and say, "it isn't always like this, kid! I'm actually a respectable, coherent human being!" However, I knew that I wouldn't be able to speak well enough to be understood. So I settled instead for saying, "whaddayawant" in a pseudo menacing manner. Three hours later, I was sober and on my way home, where I drank a gallon of water and worked out.
Ah, the good life.
With Phillip "Living Wage" Meyer, and Braden "Cost of Living" Yandle.
http://www.barbrix.com/
Rarely do I ever drink these days. It was never quite my vice, to be honest. But when I do drink, I drink. And when I day drink, I DRINK.
Barbrix - A wine bar and sometime brunch location. Inside/Outside seating, and reservations are almost certainly required if you would like a table. If you do not have a reservation, you may sit at the bar and spend two hours staring at all the empty tables that have been reserved that morning.
Bottomless mimosas for $8.00
I am going to repeat that, because that bears repeating: They serve bottomless mimosas for $8.00/person here. Do they make money off that? No. But after you get the munchies, they do.
Mimosa #1: Braden and I sat at the corner of the square bar and started off right away. After a toast to raises and feeling good about life, we downed our first one. I had been sipping on coffee for a few minutes prior, so as to prepare myself for the eventual entrance of alcohol into my system. These mimosas, by the by, were very well balanced, and delicious.
Mimosa #2: The bartender came by with refills and took our orders. I downed about half of my flute right there, determined to get my money's worth. In my head, I needed to drink about four of them to truly get value for my purchase. Two dollars a pop seemed reasonable enough.
Mimosa #3: The food came out quickly - and none too soon, as I began to feel a bit anxious and hangry. I ordered the Smoked Salmon Benedict with a side of fresh fruit. I had, at this point, been one-for-one with my coffee/mimosa intake, so I didn't feel like I was slowing down at all. I could still feel my teeth, and I wasn't slurring. Still golden. Downed most of that sucker before I dove in to my breakfast.
Braden went after the Breakfast Poutine with a side of bacon - and was also toe-to-toe with me on mimosas. The eggs are perfect at this place. Never underestimate the power of a well-prepared egg.
Mimosa #4: True to form, I inhaled my food. The bartender kept up with us quite nicely, though, which caused me to slow down and split my attention equally between bites of delectable Smoked Salmon Benedict, and mouthfuls of refreshing, inebriating mimosa.
Mimosa #5: This is where things started to get a little wonky. Braden and I were discussing concrete things, like work, and studio apartments. Now we were talking about humanism and "getting out of your comfort zone". I could feel my blood turning a light orange, and little champagne bubbles forming on my soft palate. I also think I had begun leaning forward a little. Braden went out to refill his parking meter.
Mimosa #6: I didn't even see this one happen. I drained number 5, looked away while my hand was still on the glass, and when I looked back, the glass was full. And HERE'S where they get you. To make up for the loss that they incur from making the mimosas bottomless, they tempt you with deserts. So I got the Honey Lavender Panna Cotta.
I'm going to be honest. That's not my picture. I found that on Yelp, or something. Mine was actually bigger than that. But I was so focused on eating it, that I forgot to take a picture.
Mimosa #7: I also forgot about the bartender filling up our glasses every chance he could. As I drowned in blissfully light panna cotta, round seven was right there waiting for me when I came up for air. Braden, at this point, asked for the check. Which was a good idea, as I was about half an hour from needing to refill my parking meter. Lord knows I wasn't going anywhere for a while.
Mimosa #8: This was "one for the road", I think. We paid, and finished our flutes. As I stood up, two things happened. First, I felt the world shift really sharply to the left. Second, I felt my bladder almost explode. I didn't realize just how drunk I was. And as I unceremoniously excused myself to go to the restroom, with each step I grew increasingly drunker and drunker. I suppose most of a bottle of champagne in an hour will do that to you.
Braden and I said goodbye outside the restaurant, and nodded in approval of it. Barbrix was an absolute success. As I walked across the street to my car, I knew I was in no condition to drive. Not the first time I've slept in my car, and I'm sure it will not be the last. It certainly was the first time that I slept off being drunk in a parking spot on the side of the road.
The truly strange part was having to wake up every hour to feed the meter, and being judged by the 10 year old kids on their skateboards trying to play out on the sidewalks. I wanted to look at them and say, "it isn't always like this, kid! I'm actually a respectable, coherent human being!" However, I knew that I wouldn't be able to speak well enough to be understood. So I settled instead for saying, "whaddayawant" in a pseudo menacing manner. Three hours later, I was sober and on my way home, where I drank a gallon of water and worked out.
Ah, the good life.
With Phillip "Living Wage" Meyer, and Braden "Cost of Living" Yandle.
http://www.barbrix.com/